You’re hanging out talking with some friends,
when all of a sudden the conversation turns to a
common topic - love and relationships.
And each woman at the table starts talking
about the situation she’s in and all the amazing
things about it.
At first you’re enjoying the stories and you’re
happy for your friends.
But then it hits you…
You are the only person there who ISN’T in an
ongoing positive relationship.
Everyone else at the table has someone in their
life who they’re excited and optimistic about.
Everyone else has something "real".
Everyone except you.
You’re ALONE… and that guy who you "date",
without the relationship going anywhere, well - he
doesn’t cut it.
So you stop for a second and think,
"Maybe it’s me…"
"Maybe it’s not all because of the way men are,
but how I am. That explains why I don’t have real
love in my life."
As you think about this for a second, you can’t
help but feel a little lonely all of a sudden, and
a small twinge of sadness wells up inside.
But as these feelings start to grow, you know
inside that you deserve better, and you wish the
feeling would just go away.
But it doesn’t… and the last thing you want
to do is "go there" in front of your friends.
Especially since they just got through telling
all of their great stories.
You don’t want them to know how you really feel
right now… and you wish this feeling and problem
would just go away.
You think to yourself:
"Why does love and a relationship with a man
have to be so difficult?"
"If only men weren’t so difficult to be with."
But then your "protective" side kicks in, and
you start fighting these feelings and tell
yourself:
"I don’t need a man."
"I’m happy with my life as it is."
"I’m happy to be single and focus on myself
right now, instead of wasting my time and energy
in a dead-end situation with a man."
"Men are all screwed up and trouble anyway, and
I don’t need that in my life right now."
Ahhhh… it starts to work and you calm down
and regain your "cool".
But somewhere deep down inside, you know why
you felt sad -
Seeing all your friends happy in their love
lives reminded you of something…
For all the reasons you have to be happy, and
all the ways you can convince other people (and
yourself) that you’re fulfilled, you REALLY DO
want something much, much better.
You want a REAL CONNECTION.
You want to share REAL LOVE and BE LOVED.
And you wonder how long you can avoid the
reality that these things are MISSING from your
life by staying busy and taking care of other
areas of life.
You know you can’t go on this way forever.
Something has to change.
There HAS to be something better out there for
you. Or else what’s it all for?
But then you remember…
It’s been months, maybe even years, since
you’ve actually made the time and space in your
life to meet and connect with the kind of man who
could bring great things back into your love life.
And in fact, the idea of "dating" sounds like a
complete and utter NIGHTMARE.
Sitting through a date listening to some bozo,
who has no idea how to really connect with you,
ramble on about himself, would just make you feel
even more hopeless and alone.
So you’ve basically shut out of your life, the
idea of dating and going out with men, for more
than friendship.
But then how are you supposed to meet and
connect with a great guy?
And how did EVERYONE ELSE around you manage to
become CLOSE and COMMITTED with a good guy, while
you’re having an impossible time finding a guy who
isn’t totally clueless?
Do they know something you don’t?
Are you just UNLUCKY in love… and not meant
to have a great relationship for yourself?
Are they somehow more attractive than you are?
Why does it have to be so difficult?
And why does it have to be such a "game"?
***End of story**
Ok, I know I got a little "heavy" on you
there, but it’s for your own good.
This story is basically a myth… a collection
of common situations, fears, beliefs, etc. that
women experience.
And in case you didn’t notice, a lot of what
was going on here in the story had to do with a
woman’s own limiting thoughts, frustrations and
negative beliefs about men, dating and
relationships.
If you identified with a few of these thoughts,
fears, etc. then I want you to recognize
something…
Some women have VERY FEW of these negative and
limiting thoughts.
While other women have TONS.
I’m talking 10, 20, 30 and 50 times a day here.
And what do you think that does for a woman?
Or for you?
Let’s try something new today - an exercise.
Take a second and imagine something for me…
Picture in your mind a woman you know who’s
either single or in a "troubled" relationship.
Make sure you have a clear picture of her in
your mind.
Now I want you to imagine her having negative
thoughts and fears like the ones we’ve been
talking about here.
In fact, I also want you to give her some of
the fears and negative thoughts that you have.
And now… concentrate on how these thoughts
make her FEEL and ACT.
See how they affect her emotions, her attitude
and even her body language.
I’ll give you a second to picture this clearly
in your mind…
Ok, now imagine a situation comes up for her
uncertain situation with the man in her life.
Picture her emotions, her thoughts and how she
communicates to the man in her life in your head.
I’ll give you a second to think about this and
imagine it happening in your mind.
…
…
I’ll give you another minute.
Ok, come on back.
Now, I want you answer a question for me -
How did all of her negative thoughts affect how
she interacted with her guy?
Did they help guide her to positive and
constructive communication that brought them
CLOSER together?
Or did it tend to make communication with him
MORE DIFFICULT and create DISTANCE?
I’m sure you came up with all kinds of
fascinating insights and realizations, but here’s
what I want you to see here…
Communicating from a place of fear and
insecurity with a man will more often create
DISTANCE than it will bring you and a man
together.
Unless the guy you’re with is ALREADY an expert
at communicating and dealing with these things
himself, and who keeps your fears from coming
between you both.
If only men were experts when it came to having
open, lasting relationships and communicating in
ways that would bring you closer, right?
Wouldn’t that be nice.
Well, the truth is men are RARELY experts in
these areas.
And sure… a man COULD come along and be such
a wonderful and amazing guy that he would help
make relationships and communicating easier.
But if that doesn’t happen, or the great guy
you do find doesn’t happen to have these natural
skills and abilities (and by the way, most men
don’t)…
Then guess what?
It’s up to YOU.
He’s not going to make it work FOR YOU.
In fact, the reality is that as you are first
becoming close with a man, he’s more likely to
trigger your own fears than to help resolve them.
I’m not telling you about this right now just
because I’m trying to teach you some "mumbo jumbo"
about how thoughts, energy and intention work
together…
(Which they do.)
But for another simple reason -
There’s something you can do right now to
DRAMATICALLY improve the level of connection and
intimacy you have in your love life.
It all starts in one place.
Paying attention to HOW YOU THINK.
On a basic level, your own patterns of THINKING
and FEELING lead to the ACTIONS you take and the
BEHAVIOR you display.
And guess what can create a "negative filter"
on your THINKING and FEELINGS?
FEAR.
And if you’re finding that your actions and
behaviors aren’t "naturally" attracting good men
and creating healthy long term relationships…
then you’ve got something to look at right now -
Your own thoughts and emotions, and your own
fears.
And, of course, you could worry about HIS
ISSUES too, but let’s save working on him for
later when you’re up to speed on all this for
yourself.
GETTING PAST FEAR, "CONNECTING" ON A DEEP LEVEL,
AND MAKING MEN ADDICTED TO YOUR RELATIONSHIP…
Ok, let’s get to some real ANSWERS here.
What do you DO when you have negative, fearful,
limiting thoughts and situations going on in your
mind that are affecting your love life?
Well, I’m not going to tell you that all women
who are single or in "dead-end" relationships are
in that place in their life JUST BECAUSE they
think and feel in "fear-based" and "self-limiting"
ways.
But do the math.
What kind of women do you think men "naturally"
gravitate towards?
What kind of women do you think men
"instinctively" feel good when they’re around,
even if they don’t know why?
What kind of women do you think men understand,
on a subconscious level and make great long term
partners?
Right again.
Women who are in CONTROL of their own fears and
emotions when it comes to men, dating and
relationships.
Why?
It’s NOT because feelings and emotions are
themselves bad…
Feelings and emotions are probably the most
beautiful part of what makes us human and allows
us to experience the world in a deep and
meaningful way.
But, what I’m talking about here is NEGATIVE
feelings.
Because negative feelings, more often than not,
lead to NEGATIVE EMOTIONAL EXPERIENCES.
And women who are in CONTROL of their EMOTIONAL
EXPERIENCES and who have a handle on their own
emotional state, know how to do something that
other women can’t and will never be able to
fake…
They know how to consistently create more
POSITIVE EMOTIONAL EXPERIENCES with men.
On one level, it really is that simple.
In practice, it’s much harder.
You’ll learn the SCIENCE behind emotions, how
to take your own Emotional Ownership, and
Emotional Display Rules — the "do’s and don’ts"
for creating new emotional AND intellectual wisdom
before you act in certain situations with a man.
So let’s get on now to ATTRACTION.
The truth is that men are attracted to one
woman and not another largely because of the way
that one woman makes them FEEL.
And NOT because of what logically sound
qualities each person and the relationship has.
ATTRACTION and CONNECTION have their own
"logic".
I’ll say it again so you can really hear it
this time -
A man is attracted to a woman and wants to be
with her, and only her, because of the way he
FEELS when he’s around her.
And not for any other reason.
Not even if the women is the most loving,
caring, sweet, generous, and intelligent woman in
the world.
I’m even going to "translate" this for you so
you’re sure to start seeing it more clearly -
Translation: The emotional experiences that a
man has when he’s around a woman are the single
most powerful reasons why he either wants a long
term relationship, or doesn’t.
And to make this even more clear, let me tell
you what this DOESN’T mean…
It DOESN’T mean that a man wants to be with a
woman because he VALUES a relationship and having
true love in his life.
Or that a woman can be so good to a man and do
so many loving and generous things for him that he
recognizes the LOGICAL value of staying with her
and makes the "right" decision.
Feelings and emotions have their own logic,
which has NOTHING to do with what makes "sense" or
what is "fair".
And the sooner you accept this as true about
men, the easier EVERYTHING in your love life and
relationship will become.
CREATING A DEEP LEVEL OF "EMOTIONAL ATTRACTION"
THAT WILL LEAD TO A LASTING RELATIONSHIP
So how do you make a man FEEL when he’s around
you?
What are the conscious and subconscious
emotional reactions and responses he’s likely to
be having with you, based on your emotions and
your behavior?
Take a minute and think about it.
..
..
Here’s the bottom line…
A woman who can communicate to a man on a
deeper level that she’s AWARE and IN CONTROL of
her own experience and "emotional" state will make
a man feel INTENSE ATTRACTION for her on that same
emotional level.
She’s an "emotionally attractive" woman, which
can tell a man all kinds of things about her
BEYOND the PHYSICAL ATTRACTION and interest he
might have.
On the other hand…
Women who DON’T have a handle on these things
have quite a different affect on men -
These women can still usually make men feel
PHYSICAL ATTRACTION… but they often set off all
kinds of conscious and subconscious "warning
signs" in a man’s mind.
Signals that then become FEELINGS and EMOTIONS
inside the man that tells him to RUN.
And under no circumstance commit himself and
attach his emotional experience to hers.
Here’s the strangest part about women who send
off these "warning signals" to men…
Most women do this largely ON ACCIDENT.
That’s right. Lots of women actually trigger
negative responses inside a man’s mind while doing
things they think are FOR THE GOOD of the
relationship.
How’s that for COUNTERPRODUCTIVE?
And hey… I know it might bother you to hear
some of what I’m saying. And that you probably
have been more caring and generous with your
thoughts and emotions in your past situations with
men than they were with you.
I get that.
But someone needs to tell you how men really
and truly think when it comes to women and
relationships.
And of course men have their own specialized
set of "baggage" and fears too.
But let me ask you…
What do you know, FROM EXPERIENCE, will happen
if a man doesn’t deal with his own fears about
women and relationships?
DISASTER.
I’m talking withdrawal, break-ups, cheating,
lying, etc.
The list goes on.
But if a guy takes the time and develops the
"emotional maturity" to think about the negative
and limiting fears HE HAS about women and
relationships…
And finds a healthy level of AWARENESS and
CONTROL around these…
Then this is the kind of guy that women will
"naturally" be drawn to and enjoy being with.
Your first step to creating a situation with a
man where you BOTH feel the level of CONNECTION
and ATTRACTION that will create and support a
LASTING RELATIONSHIP is to accept that MEN DON’T
MAKE SENSE.
Why?
Because remember, our EMOTIONS don’t follow a
logical or "rational" path.
If you’re interested in learning more about
what I call "Emotional Attraction" - which is the
kind of attraction and desire in a man that goes
BEYOND PHYSICAL ATTRACTION, then I’d suggest you
go check out my latest CD/DVD program.
It’s called "Natural & Lasting Attraction"
This program is the world’s first complete
guide and reference on how to create both that
initial "connection" and LASTING LONG TERM
ATTRACTION…
While showing you how to deal with all of the
common relationship-ending obstacles you’ll run
into with men, and within yourself, along the way.
Inside this 7 hour program, I cover everything
from the psychological foundations of how and why
a man becomes connected and attracted to a woman
for a lasting relationship… to exactly what to
do in the frustrating situation where you start
getting closer and more connected with a man, but
then he starts to withdraw and act MORE DISTANT as
time goes on.
By the way, the material in this program is all
NEW MATERIAL that wasn’t covered in my eBook, if
you’ve already read it.
But let me ask you…
Wouldn’t it be great to know the specific
emotional and verbal "strategies" of women, who
seem to effortlessly and "naturally" attract men,
are?
In this program I get deep into these areas and
teach you how to keep that deep level of
connection and intimacy growing with a man - in a
way that will have HIM initiating the growth too.
That way it’s not always you feeling like you
have to "drive" your relationship to get where
you’re going.
You’ll know how to help him "take the wheel"
too… and love every minute of it.
I also focus on the common negative or
counterproductive "strategies" that LOTS of women
take on when things don’t seem to be moving
forward.
Seeing these common negative strategies,
learning where they come from, and figuring out
how to avoid them is CRITICAL.
Knowing exactly what NOT TO DO will bring you
the CLARITY you’ve been looking for with men, and
save you tons of wasted time and energy in your
love life.
Here’s the thing…
I spent a good portion of this program focusing
on helping you to identify YOUR OWN specific fears
and frustrations with men and relationships that
are holding you back right now -
Some of which I’ve already had you take a short
look at here.
Inside this program I walk you through powerful
guided exercises to help you clearly recognize
your own important "trouble spots".
Then I show you how to immediately turn them
into POSITIVE action steps and INSTANTLY change
your old relationship and communication patterns
into positive results and outcomes.
But you don’t have to listen to me - some GUY
telling you all this.
You can watch REAL VIDEO of REAL WOMEN, who
experienced this program live, tell you their
stories and what they got out of the program as a
woman.
Follow the link below and go to the bottom of
the page and watch the videos there and let me
know what you think:
http://www.CatchHimAndKeepHim.com/e/fstr01/NALA
I’m so sure you’re going to get MASSIVE RESULTS
and take your love life, perspective, and
AWARENESS to the next level with this program that
I’ll do something special here…
I’m going to let you try out the program for 30
days without paying a thing.
Zero.
I’ll ship you your copy of the CDs or DVDs for
to you work with for 30 whole days.
If you don’t get everything you thought you’d
get out of the program and more, simply let me
know and you won’t pay a thing.
No questions asked.
So what do you have to lose?
Not much.
But what you have to gain could mean everything
to your future love life and relationship.
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